Self Management Skills for Elementary Students: A Counselor's Guide

🧠 What Is Self-Management in SEL?

Self-management is one of the five core competencies of Social-Emotional Learning (SEL), as outlined by CASEL. It refers to a student’s ability to:

• Regulate emotions

• Manage stress and frustration

• Control impulses

• Set and work toward personal goals

• Stay motivated, even when it’s hard

For elementary students, this might look like:

• Taking a deep breath when frustrated

• Raising a hand instead of shouting

• Waiting their turn

• Trying again after making a mistake

These are foundational life skills—and they can be taught.

✏️ How to Teach Self-Management in Elementary School

Here are a few counselor-approved ways to help kids build strong self-management habits in your classroom or small groups:

1. Teach Emotional Vocabulary

Kids can’t manage what they can’t name. Start by building emotional awareness with feelings check-ins, visuals, and books. Help students identify their emotions before they act on them.

2. Model & Practice Coping Strategies

Integrate self-regulation tools into your day, like:

• Deep breathing

• Mindfulness breaks

• Stretching

• Visual calm corners

Model these strategies often and encourage students to try different techniques to see what works best for them.

3. Use a Consistent Problem-Solving Framework

One of the most effective tools I use with students is the Stop, Think, Do method:

• STOP and notice the emotion or situation

• THINK about your choices and possible outcomes

• DO the best choice that’s safe, respectful, and kind

When students learn to pause and reflect before acting, they’re more likely to make thoughtful decisions.

💡 Why I Use the Stop, Think, Do Bundle

The Stop, Think, Do Bundle is one of my go-to tools for teaching and reinforcing self-management skills all year long. It includes:

• Engaging worksheets

• Interactive activities and games

• Posters and desk reminders

• Scenario cards
  ...all built around the Stop, Think, Do framework.

This bundle is perfect for:

• Whole class SEL lessons

• Small counseling groups

• Individual student check-ins

• Behavior support plans
  
  

It’s low-prep, kid-friendly, and most importantly—it works.

➡️ Check out the full Stop, Think, Do Bundle here

🎯 Real-Life Example: What This Looks Like in Practice

During a recent small group, one of my third graders was struggling with interrupting and getting frustrated during turn-taking games. After a quick refresher using the Stop, Think, Do reminder and scenario cards, he started pausing and saying to himself, “Stop. Think. Wait your turn.”

The result? Fewer outbursts, more positive interactions—and a big boost in confidence.

🌱 Final Thoughts

Self-management skills don’t develop overnight—but with consistent teaching, practice, and reinforcement, every student can make meaningful progress. As educators and caregivers, we have the power to provide tools that stick with kids far beyond the classroom.

👉 Want an all-in-one self-management solution?
➡️ Get the Stop, Think, Do Bundle and start building confident, self-aware students today.